Overcoming Victim Mentality and Taking Responsibility

If you are feeling hopeless, sorry for yourself, lacking control and wishing that things are somehow going to get better, while secretly feeling angry at the world, god, the universe, destiny… or anything outside you that seems to have caused your disastrous situation, then it’s very likely you are playing the role of a victim. You are blaming others for your problems and thus keeping them in place by shying away from your own responsibility of them. 

If you have found yourself in such a situation now, you feel sorry for yourself, nothing seems to work and a feeling of stuckness looms over your life –  don’t worry about it. Do not resist the life situation that has been presented to you – resistance will only make it worse.

There is nothing wrong with feeling the way you do, so allow yourself to feel the way you are feeling. If you feel like you are the victim, if you feel that someone else is to blame and you even have logical, rational reasons to believe that way, then you have every right to feel the way you do.

But consider this – taking responsibility for your thoughts, emotions, actions and every part of your life means you have the ability to change it and take back the steering wheel.

Breathing – A Portal into the Present Moment

The majority of people on Earth rarely apprebreathing-presence-now-portal-spiritualityciate or make use of one of the simplest things in life –  the bodily process for oxygenating and sustaining the life in every cell of their body. Though this biological process (although far more than that in reality) seems so deceptively simple, it is one of the most powerful tools for healing, relaxation, bridging the gap and connecting the mind and body,  as well as coming in contact with the deep sense of peace, well-being and joy that comes with clearing your mind and abiding in the now. Thus acting as a portal into the ever present Now, a portal into the present moment.

The power of breathing can at times seem almost magical, but you need to practice it consciously to feel its power and realize its potential.


To most people, the word surrender means “giving up” and in general has a very negative connotation, mostly associated with defeat and failure.

Jesus on the cross, symbolizing the deepest surrender.

But true surrender, on a spiritual level, is an extremely positive action that frees you from the shackles of mind made resistance to the situation, place or person you are experiencing. It is the failure and defeat of the limited mind and the victory of the unconditional, deepest self that you are at your essence.

Spiritual surrender fundamentally means completely embracing and thus transcending your limited sense of self and with that all resistance associated with it.

It is the complete and total acceptance of a situation, person, place or thing that is currently present either only in your mind as a thought or picture connected to an emotional response or as an actual physical event unfolding in front of you (which is of course also always associated with a mental and emotional response – the physical event holds no meaning on its own until the mind gives it meaning and resists it, which is then the main cause of suffering).



“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion”

– The Dalai Lama

Compassion is an amazing thing. To be able to see the perspective of another and perceive the world from their point of view is a very important skill to have.

But compassion goes far beyond that, it is not really a skill, but a way of being and relating to other beings in the process.

What we see in the world right now is a tremendous lack of compassion. Humans at this moment, simply cannot relate to other beings and see them as someone that also seeks happiness and wants to avoid suffering. As a result of that we are creating a world full of anger and fear.

The first that is needed is compassion for ourselves. What this means is that we need to become aware of our suffering, the repressed hurtful emotions and tendencies that are outside of our current field of awareness, (because we have blocked them and thus narrowed our field of consciousness) usually buried in our subconscious or just on the edge of our conscious perception.

Since most people are not even aware they are suffering, they can hardly understand that others are suffering, or empathize with them.

Most people are simply in a state of blankness or resistance. They feel nothing, or at least very little – thus they cannot feel either happiness or suffering since they have desensitized themselves to both.

When we see and actually become aware that we are in a state of suffering, but have simply covered it up with resistance, we can finally engage our buried emotions, thoughts and inner wounds.

By becoming conscious of them and embracing them we can dissolve them and with that gain a deeper understanding of our own experience and the experience of all beings.

Triple Welcoming Process – The Sedona Method

Here I’ve uploaded one of my favorite processes in audio format designed for letting go of any and all limiting emotions, beliefs, thoughts, pictures and sensations. Anything and everything blocking you from experiencing joy, peace, love and freedom, as well as clarity, peace of mind and energy (and associated physical health), that are available to you beyond the fog that is superimposed on your Self.

The recording comes from one of my favorite courses on inner growth that involves a very simple, yet effective technique for ridding oneself of any and all limiting mental and emotional baggage – “The Sedona Method”, taught by Hale Dwoskin. This clip comes from the sister program of the method called “Beyond Letting Go”.

I have personally been using the Sedona Method and several programs related to it with great results for more than ten years now and I highly recommend them all.

Even this audio alone, if you listen to it repeatedly, can be enough to rid yourself of an incredible amount of inner turmoil and resistance to the freedom and peace that always flow in this very moment.

I often enjoy going through this process on my own, by talking myself verbally or even mentally through the whole process, so ultimately there is no audio required, it is simply an aid that can be useful to help you concentrate, learn the process and relax. Of course some people prefer listening to the audio rather than doing it on their own – and if that is the case I encourage you to listen to this recording on repeat as often as you wish.

As you listen simply allow yourself to embrace whatever comes up. Questions that are being asked are there to guide you into becoming aware of various aspects of your inner pain and conditioning. As you become aware of these aspects, (which can be divided into three main categories – [1.] your thoughts/emotions/sensations, [2.] your wants and [3.] the feeling of the whole issue being personal, the sense of identification) allow yourself to embrace and welcome them.

This will then allow you to integrate them and dissolve them from your consciousness.

Enjoy 🙂

If you want, you can download this process by clicking here. (if you don’t get a direct download link, right click on the link and click “save as”/”save target as”)

Link to the official Sedona Method website:

Direct link to the Beyond Letting Go program this audio is from:

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